Top ten reasons it’s better to be an infant:
- You don’t have to go to work.
- Your clothes and your pajamas are interchangeable and both supremely comfortable.
- You don’t remember bad things that may have happened so everyday is a good day.
- You can well, umm, eliminate, anywhere you please and someone else has to clean it up.
- If you fall asleep in the car your whole bed gets moved with you when you reach your destination.
- You can scream and cry whenever you want.
- Everybody tells you how beautiful you are.
- You can fall asleep anytime, anywhere, in any position and never wake up stiff and sore.
- You never have a bad hair day.
And the number one reason it’s good to be an infant:
Your thighs are supposed to be chunky.
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