Potty Talk

Why is it so hard for my children to go to the bathroom when they need to?  Does anyone else out there have this problem? 

I’m giving Drew a pass, three months seems a little early to potty train…

Sam, my oldest, took forever to potty train.  At one point when he was 3 ½ we made the mistake of threatening to put him back in diapers--he was thrilled.  Oops.  He remained in diapers until he turned 4 and still had regular accidents into kindergarten.  I know all kids are different and some take longer than others but I don’t understand why he resisted it so strongly.  If he was doing the potty dance, (I know you all know what that is), we would suggest he go to the bathroom.  I thought that was a pretty normal response.  He would throw a fit, refuse to go and then have an accident.  ARGH!

Toby actually potty trained much more easily.  After swearing that I was just going to leave him in diapers until he was 7, I ended up training him at 2 ½ because he started kicking me during diaper changes.  2 ½ year olds are strong, those kicks hurt!  We threw him a party and took him out to the backyard on a gorgeous spring day with no pants and lots of water and juice.  He got it almost immediately. 

Still, both boys will wait until the absolute last second before they decide to go.  They don’t want to interrupt what they are doing and I get that, but at some point I would think the pain from bladder extension and the inability to sit still would interfere with the enjoyment of their tasks.  Apparently I am wrong because both still refuse to go at my suggestion.

The other night they were watching TV before bed and I could tell Toby had to go.  I suggested multiple times that he do this, I offered to pause the TV, he wouldn’t have had to miss a thing.  He denied feeling a need.  As soon as it was time for bath, both boys were suddenly desperate and fighting over the toilet.  It’s not like we only have one, we just only have one upstairs and both boys wanted it at the same time.  Toby grudgingly agreed to use one downstairs and assured me that he “made it”.  I found out later through wet socks that he didn’t.

My mother would say I bear some responsibility for this given that I was similar as a child.  I think I once lost a trip to Burger King (my favorite restaurant!) because I refused to go and wet my pants. 

So maybe it’s normal but boy is it frustrating--especially when Toby did the same thing the next night!

Sam’s preschool teacher once told me that he would be potty trained before he went to college and that the timing of it wouldn’t be on the application.  That was good advice, it calmed me down at the time, but it’s easy for her to take the long view.  She’s not the one doing the laundry.